How to Stop Overthinking and Identify the Thoughts Keeping You Stuck

What are the thoughts that go on in your mind that you believe about yourself every single day?

Not the ones you say out loud. The ones that just quietly swim around inside your brain. The ones that eat you alive a little bit at a time.

Things like:

“I’m awkward in social situations.”
“I’m just not a good mom.”
“I’m terrible at marketing. No one is going to want to hire me.”

Those thoughts that make you feel less than. The ones you never say out loud but rehearse so many times they start to feel like truth.

But here is what I want you to consider today. What if some of the things you believe about yourself are not things you actually chose to believe? What if they were just thoughts you rehearsed enough times that you started adopting them as reality? And slowly, without even realizing it, they became part of how you see yourself.

That is exactly what we are unpacking today. And I cannot wait to walk you through it.

Our Anchor Verse

Before we dive in, I want to root us in Romans 12:2, and I want you to read it with fresh eyes today. Not as a verse you have heard a hundred times, but as words that are speaking directly to you right now.

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”

Did you catch that? God transforms us by changing the way we think. Not by us white-knuckling our way through it. Not by sheer willpower. He does the transforming. We just have to be willing to let Him in.

And that is the most important thing I want you to take away from this blog today. You cannot do this in your own strength. You need to call on the Lord to help renew your mind. And when you do, He will show you His good, perfect, and pleasing will for your life.

A Simple Three-Step Framework

Here are three steps to help you identify the thought patterns that are keeping you stuck and start replacing them with God’s truth.

Step One: Notice

The first step is simply to draw awareness around what your thoughts actually are. We race through life so fast that we rarely stop to ask ourselves what we are actually rehearsing in our minds. What thoughts keep popping up? Which ones do you ruminate on? And which ones have quietly become part of how you see yourself?

To help you get started, I want you to fill in the blank on each of these:

I always…
I never…
I can’t…
I’m not…
I’m bad at…
I’ll never…
I don’t know how to…
I don’t have…
I have to…

Did anything come up for you? Hold onto that. We are going to use it in the next steps.

I will go first. Two of the thought patterns I rehearse a lot are “I never have enough time to do what I want to do” and “I don’t know how to explain my offer in a way that makes people want it.” Those thoughts get stuck on repeat and keep me from moving forward. And I am guessing you have a few of your own that are doing the same thing to you.

Write them down. Get them out of your head and onto paper. Because you cannot change what you cannot see.

Step Two: Name It

This is the step most people want to skip because it requires going a little deeper. But it is so important.

Once you have noticed the surface level thought, I want you to dig underneath it and name the belief that is forming because of it. Because the thought is just the surface. Underneath it is a story you are starting to tell yourself about who you are.

For me, when I keep ruminating on the thought that I cannot explain my offer well, the belief underneath it is that I am not good enough. That what God put on my heart is not valuable. Nobody is going to pay for it. That is imposter syndrome creeping in, and it is keeping me small.

When I rehearse the thought that I never have time, the belief underneath it is that nobody really cares about what I want. And that belief starts making me bitter toward the people I love most.

See how powerful this is? The thought is just the symptom. The belief underneath it is what is actually keeping you stuck. And we have to name it before we can change it.

Step Three: Replace

Now comes the part that actually changes things. We are going to replace that lie with God’s truth.

This is where Scripture becomes so powerful, not as something we read and forget, but as something we intentionally pair with the lies that keep coming up for us. When we can match truth directly to the specific thought patterns that are holding us back, that is how we actually get unstuck.

Here are a couple of examples from my own life:

Thought: I never have enough time to do what I want to do.
Belief underneath it: Nobody cares about what I want.
Truth to replace it: I do have time. I just need to get better at protecting it and stop blaming others for what I have not advocated for myself.
Scripture: Proverbs 16:3 — “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”

Thought: I can’t explain my offer in a way that makes sense.
Belief underneath it: I am not good enough. What God put on my heart is not valuable.
Truth to replace it: I just need more practice. The transformation I help women experience is real, and I am still learning how to communicate it well.
Scripture: James 1:4 — “Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

If you are not sure which scriptures apply to your specific thoughts, I love using an AI tool like Claude to help. Just share the lie you are struggling with, the belief underneath it, and the truth you want to replace it with, and ask for a few scriptures that support that truth. It is such a helpful way to find the words of God that speak directly to what you are walking through.

Your Challenge This Week

Pause right here and grab a piece of paper. Walk through this exercise with one or two of your own thought patterns:

Notice: What thought keeps coming up for you? Use the fill-in-the-blank prompts above to identify it.
Name it: What belief is forming underneath that thought? How is it keeping you stuck or making you feel less than?
Replace it: Write out a truth to counter that lie, and find a scripture to anchor it.

This is not about eliminating every negative thought you will ever have. That is not realistic and God knows that. But He does want us to stop rehearsing those thoughts until they become our identity. He wants to set us free from the things that are keeping us small.

One thought at a time. Baby steps. That is all He is asking.

A Note Before You Go

God is not asking you to never have a negative thought again. He knows we are going to struggle with this. But what He wants from us is to step into the freedom He has already given us. To stop rehearsing the lies. To align our thoughts with what is actually true. And to let Him renew our minds so that we can walk fully in the purpose He has for us.

Because those thoughts that keep coming up? If you are not careful, they will become your identity. They will become part of who you think you are. And that is not who God says you are.

If you want to be surrounded by a community of Christian female entrepreneurs who are doing life and business differently with God at the center, I would love for you to join us in The Purpose Gathering. It is completely free and I will link it below.

Come hang out with us here every single week, and I cannot wait to see you in the next blog post.

Related Episodes:

Resources:

Purpose Pages Directory – A free, vetted online directory to help you find Christian coaches and service providers you can trust.
Follow Purpose Pages on Instagram – Find trusted Christian providers and connect with a community that gets you.
The Purpose Gathering Live (Waitlist) – A Spirit-led day to refocus, reconnect & recharge in Downtown Gilbert, AZ. Live worship, speaker sessions, guided reflection, and intentional connection with faith-driven women in business. Grab your ticket
Join the Faith-Fueled Fireside on October 15th at 10AM (AZ Time) – This virtual gathering is an opportunity to connect with like minded mamas who are ready to trade hustle for peace this season.
Join the Free Purpose Gathering Community – A welcoming space for Christian mompreneurs to connect, grow, and be encouraged in both life and business.
Ideal Week Blueprint — A mini course that walks you through how to create your ideal week, including personal templates and examples.
The Armor of God – Bible Study for Women with Video Access
Grace Over Grind: How Grace Will Take Your Business Where Grinding Can’t
Have a question for me? Or a specific struggle you’re dealing with? I’ll address your question on the podcast. Submit your ‘Ask Ashley’ question here.
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